I'm a jealous person and I know there are a lot of you out there too. I just can't seem to shake this jealousy thing sometimes. I'll get these thoughts in my head that my girl can do better and that one night she might try. She's going away this weekend to visit her friends who live out of town. I hate these girls. They're single and I think together they've had every man from here to inner Mongolia. I hate it when she goes out with them. I can't help but get these feelings that she'll do something when I'm not there. Anyone have any advice on getting over these feeligs?
Singles & Dating - 10 Answers
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1 :
Seek counseling to improve your self-esteem, then you won't be jealous anymore.
2 :
I am interested in knowing the answer to this one to.
3 :
Jealousy is a big deal when your in a relationship. You have to trust the person or the relationship won't work. Shallow the jealousy and let her be free. If shes going to cheat, shes going to do it whether you let her be free or not. Let her continue to do her own things and she will love you for that, and she wont need a better guy. If yall have been together for a long time I'm sure she loves you. When you start to get those jealous feelings think of all the good times you have had together and get over it.
4 :
It sucks to be of the jealous ones doesn't it? I know this cause I also am. The thing is you just gotta suck it up and try your best to trust in her and your love for eachother. Nothing else seems to work....trust me on that one..... Just think....atleast her friends are out of town and not sitting in your house everyday. :P Hope it works out for ya.
5 :
If you beleive in Karma, you need to get rid of what you are feeling it's not a part of you, and you need to tell it to leave. Jealousy starts out little and it gets big really fast and yours seem harmless but unless you get rid of it, it will get worse. Spirits do exist and jealousy is one of them, just tell it to leave.
6 :
well its hard to get rid of your own jealousy its allot easier for your bf/gf to give u some confidence...
7 :
I've come to find that it's a lot easier to be jealous when I've done things myself, I know how I act and then I see my guy do those things, and I wonder...but now that I've gotten someone I completely trust, and I havn't done anything behind his back, it's a lot easier, though there are times I freak...and my reason is I can't imagine my life without him...I know he's the one for me, I feel it...and even though he tells me the same...how can I know for sure...I wonder, what if his one and only walks up to him one day and he realizes he's not supposed to be with me, then I have to get a grip on myself...which you should do too...it's hard, but swallow and know...she loves you, you love her...and everythings going to happen for a reason...I feel you though, just be strong.
8 :
Honestly, you just have to grow up. It is more of a controlling issue than jealousy. If you really dont trust her then why are you with her?? I really think you need to get over yourself and give the girl some freedom. How are you going to live your relationship based on what you think she might do, I hate guys like that and so do most girls. It is not attractive and it puts a big red flag over your head stamped with LOSER. I am not saying that you are a loser, and sorry if it sounds harsh.
9 :
I can see why you are concerned. You are who you hang out with. Those girls sounds trampy and might encourage your girl to do those things too. I would ask her what draws her to those kinds of girls? Try to control your emotions but let her know you want to trust her, it's just you are afraid her friends will influence her. I am the jealous type too and I get really mad if my man even looks at another girl. It makes me feel insecure and unimportant. I've tried to get rid of my jealousy by reassuring myself that I am the one that will be there when he gets home.
10 :
Man that is a tough one. Everyone is different and gets jealous in varying degrees and for various reasons. But I will attempt to help you out. Would you be so jealous of her if you had 2 or 3 other girlfriends? I mean real girls that were yours to have in any way you'd like? Seriously would you be so jealous if you knew she was worried about what YOU were going to do while she was out? My point is, in your head you are fully invested in her. Now I am not suggesting that you cheat or not be committed to her however you may want to have other things in life that you can focus on such as self improvement, career, finances etc. No one should ever be someone else's only important thing in life. If you don't love you as much as you love her then she will wonder if she should be loving you soo much too! By the way, there is no point in worrying that she might screw you over... if she is going to do it do you think that worrying would make any difference? Also when you worry, you sub-communicate that you believe you are of less value then you actually may be. It sends a signal to her that she IS with someone who is NOT as good as what she thought she had. Point blank, you need to get a life, go to the gym, make new friends, take night classes on an interesting subject "preferably women dominated classes" etc. Learn to dance Salsa or something else, etc. additionally: there is nothing wrong with surrounding yourself with many beautiful women and even flirting with them even if you are in a committed relationship. I do it all the time however I have a tremendous amount of self control and as far as cheating is concerned, I take pride in knowing I can replace any girlfriend that acts up. Desperate people cheat because they are afraid they won't have the confidence to hook with others without already having a girlfriend/boyfriend. pathetic!
11 :
You pretty well sum up the whole problem in the one sentence where you said you have it in your head that she could do better.That's where the jealousy begins. Do you know that she loves you for who and what you are? And do you know that you love her the same way? So stop worrying that she could do better. Know that YOU are the best man for the job and know that she doesn't want anyone but you. If she did, she wouldn't be with you now. Would she? Of course not! You can overcome jealousy with confidence in yourself and in her. Otherwise, your hang-up with that green monster may drive her away. The solution lies within you.
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